Wednesday, September 15, 2010

I don't know what is going on with me

I just can't seem to get in the groove to do anything including blogging. I guess I didn't get the job. I had left them a message and never heard anything so oh well. I wonder if the hope then lack of hope has anything to do with my lack of interest in what seems to be everything.
It isn't just the blogging it is everything. I can see the dirt piling up in the corners of the house and I still only spot clean. I put the laundry into the dryer to dry then leave it there. Even my cooking is half assed. And I love to cook.
I need to snap out of this. It really is beginning to piss me off. This waffling back and forth between normal and not normal. I need to "man up".
It is really rather irritating to look at something you enjoy and care less.
Yesterday I had a burst of screw this you need to take care of stuff you are just letting sit. So I called and made a appointment for boob squishing that is several months overdue. I made a appointment for my itchy hands. I called in regards to my cobra which I found out is going to go from $137.55 per month to $393 per month in November. OUCH!!!!!
I applied for jobs like normal. I wish someone would pay me for applying lol.
I wrote a nasty letter to the cemetery due to the neglect of the 9-11 memorial I visit every year to place flowers. I actually got a call back from the manager saying he had went out and agreed with everything I said in my letter. We seem to be playing phone tag now.
Wow this post is all over the place isn't it?
That is how my mind is lately. Nothing smooth and flowing just unjointed and off.

Tonight survivor starts. WOOT. Love that damn show. And this time it is the old people versus the young people. Wanna know what is old? Over 40. UGH might as well start researching rest homes for myself now.
Anywhoooo gotta go get squished. Talk to you all soon I hope.


  1. You're in a funk, and I think looking for a job and getting no call backs is frustrating myself. I don't blame you for feeling the way you do. I hate COBRA! They're such a rip-off. But its better than having nothing. Now if they paid 100% of everything, sure, maybe. But having to pay $300 on top of high co-pays for everything is just not fair.

    I think maybe you could use some mental stimulation. I don't know how or what, but that might bring motivation to your soul.

  2. That sometimes happens to me. It's kind of happening right now actually. Makes me just want to take off and hide somewhere.

  3. "It is really rather irritating to look at something you enjoy and care less." This, by definition is depression. I don't know how helpful this is, or whether you have the means, but if this goes on very long, you should really think about talking to someone and maybe taking something... I'm slow to suggest that based on my own experiences, but it might help.

    I think Aunt is right, some mental stimulation might be good. Maybe you could think about volunteering some time somewhere? A few hours a week, might give you something else to think about and get your mind moving in some new directions. And who knows, it just might lead to some new connections and job opportunities you never saw coming/never imagined.

    I know I'm 12 days behind on this post and hopefully you're feeling better now, but if not, maybe this will have helped. I hope...