Dear House,

WTF!

No really, WHAT IN THE FUCK HAPPENED?

How is it possible that in the five days that I have been gone the entire house is disgusting?

I think I had to wade through a inch of dog and cat hair just in the living room alone.
My brown couch is white with fur from the cat.
There was kitty litter all over the house including the kitchen EWWWW
The covers were on the floor instead of on the bed.
The dishes that I washed were still in the dish drain but both sides of the sink were full of dirty dishes.
There is probably 5 loads of laundry to be done not including the load in the dryer and the load in the washer.
The cat obviously missed the litter box once.
The cat obviously jumped up onto the newly white couch to throw up a monster hairball.
And all of that I could probably of handled... sort of.

BUT

When I stepped in my shower last night I froze. I literally stood there with my mouth hanging open shuddering. I have never in my life ever seen my shower that dirty. It honestly looked like the floor of a nasty gas station bathroom on the walls in there. Mold. Black goo. Red goo. White goo.
I showered and still felt filthy after getting out of there.

How in the world did that happen? How can my house be this disgusting in that short of a amount of time? I cleaned the damn thing before I left.
And that shower. I have never in my life ever seen my shower look like that. Ever. How could it possibly look like that in five days? It doesn't seem possible that it could look like that. GROSS

I guess I have quite a bit of cleaning to do over the next few days.

Anywhooo.......
Had a great time at grandma's for Christmas eve. Christmas was fun as Sazy arrived. And my birthday? We spent 10 hours in a casino LMAO!! I lost every bit of my birthday money.

Well I have tons of stuff to do and just a little time before the honey gets home.

I am so tempted to hire someone to clean that bathroom. I am afraid of it.

Talk to you all tomorrow.

Time to head up to grandmas *\o/*

Tomorrow I leave for grandmas for Christmas. I won't be back until late the 28th so I don't expect to blog until the 29th. Just a fyi by the way :)

I won an award. It is a funny little award that seems to have no reason or no rules. I am all about no rules lol. Well it has one rule. I am suppose to list 5 things about me that you do not know but I decided to be a rebel and do it differently. Then I am suppose to give this award to five blogs. Now since these almost feel like chain letters (which by the way I delete lol) You do not have to do anything you don't want to do. In fact I may rebel even further and just NOT list the blogs.
See I am kind of lazy and have a thousand things I need to do before I leave at oh dark thirty tomorrow.

But without further ado...
Here is my award!


It was given to me by one of my favorite bloggers. Big Mama Cass

Now I kidnapped this from another blog to use as my "five" things.... Enjoy lol

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? I wrap my gifts in paper. However there are never any bows. See, I have this cat who eats ribbons and bows and then yacks all over everything. So no bows. I do use gift bags once in a while though.

2. Real tree or Artificial? It has to be real. There is nothing like the smell of a fresh Christmas tree in the house. If I ever live in the mountains it will be a live tree that I can plant after the holidays.

3. When do you put up the tree? Normally? The first of December. Or that week. This year? 10 days before Christmas.

4. When do you take the tree down? I tend to either take it down the first garbage day after Christmas. Unless of course that day happens to be within a day of Christmas. This year it will be up until the new year.

5. Do you like eggnog? mmmmmmmmmmmmmm eggnog YUM YUM YUM. But add alchohol and BLICK

6. Favorite gift received as a child? It was a little cooking set. With plastic pans and mixers and spoons and just general things you need to cook with. I made flower, berry mud pies for hours.

7. Hardest person to buy for? The honey. Why? Because we have been together going on 20 years and he and I have everything we need to be happy.

8. Easiest person to buy for? Kids. Buy a fun toy and you are done!

9. Do you have a nativity scene? Yes. But again my inner rebel came out. I didn't want a stuffy traditional one. I mean those are fine but they aren't me. So I bought a cutesy cartoonish ceramic set that I love.

10. Mail or email Christmas cards? I mail my cards. This year I mailed out 30 cards to family and friends. I have a blast choosing the wierdest, funniest card possible. Of course this year all I got were traditional pretty cards which made me worry for about point two seconds and then said who cares if they think I am weird lol

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? Ab roller from an x boyfriend. I weighed in at 110 pounds then and he still thought I was to fat. Bastard

12. Favourite Christmas Movie? Its a wonderful life. To me it is not Christmas without watching it even though I know I am going to boo hoo twice.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? I try to start in November most years.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Yes a candle

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? EVERYTHING lol

16. Lights on the tree? Of course. Colored ones.

17. Favorite Christmas song? I like the old time Christmas songs. There are just two many to list as favorite since they are all like old friends.

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? This is the holiday for family and mine lives far away so I travel.

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Dasher, dancer, prancer and vikson (sp), comet and cupid and donner and blitzen plus RUDOLPH.

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? Neither. I have a snowman.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? On Christmas eve we open one present. On Christmas morning at oh dark thirty we open the rest. Although this year the honey and I have all ready opened our gifts to each other. It is a weird Christmas.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Shopping people who suck. They forget their manners.

23. Favorite ornament, theme, or color? Each ornament is like an old friend so I can't choose. I have no theme and no color choice either.

24. Favorite for Christmas Dinner? Turkey. mmmm... or honey baked ham

25. What do you want to do for Christmas this year? Spend it with my family. But next year I am going to reimplement my Italian Christmas if I can.

26. Favorite Christmas tradition growing up? There really wasn't any traditions growing up.

27. Favorite tradition now? hmmm making cookies. Of course I didn't really do the giant day of cooking them this year. This IS a weird year.

28. Favorite Christmas Memory? Just everyone being so damn happy to be with each other. That's it I guess.


hmmm do I want to list some of my favorite blogs? hmmmm....
Here are some I read almost every day.
Wonderful world of weiners
Gigi's rambling
Aunt of 14
Fact woman She scares me with how organized she is lol

This is like picking favorite children and is making me feel kind of icky so I am only going to post one more. But let me tell you I have a bunch more blogs I read every day so if you are not listed I am sorry. Seriously this picking is making me feel icky :(

My buddy Kevin

Well I have to go pack and go pick up some toys for the dogs for Christmas. I will miss everyone I read!

It's the most Crazy time of the year

Yesterday I finished up the wrapping. I have a giant 50 inch tv (the honey's nephew's gift for his parents) and my grandmothers gift left to wrap. I baked like a mad woman. Cookies and orange cranberry bread. I got all my stuff ready to go to grandmas and I applied for about 6 jobs.
Yes, I am still applying even though it is the week before Christmas. I am hoping that some how some way maybe one of these people I have sent a resume to in the last month will call me after the first of the year. It honestly feels as if I have been out of work for a year. I know it has only been 5 months but that is 5 months to long if you ask me.
My news station was showing a group of people last night who are also out of work. Want to panic? Watch them document people who have been out of work since January and haven't heard a word either.
Not having a job is like being in hell. UGH!

Here are some of the decorations in my house. I still cannot for the life of me figure out how in the hell to shrink the pictures so if you want to see the whole thing you will need to click on them. (Please excuse the white fur on the rug. I have a giant white lab and a long haired white cat who shed like mad all day long)
PLEASE CLICK PICTURES TO GET WHOLE EFFECT

You will notice the lack of ornaments on the bottom of the tree. With two indoor cats and a lab who has no idea she has a tail it is just easier to not add them then to have to pick them up every day.






And here is the outside



Now there are decorations in every room but that is the living room and outside.



Ok so now that I have had my kindle since the 3rd of this month and played with it a bit I feel a tad bit better in reviewing it.

It freaking ROCKS!!!!

I had 8 paperback books (had just went on a shopping spree right before it arrived) so I decided to do side by side. Read a book, read a kindle book, read a book, read a kindle book.

There is something to be said for each type. A paperback has a great hand feel. It is like an old friend. Easy to carry around. We all know how good a book feels in our hands so I don't need to go on and on.

Now for the kindle. There are a few pluses that an actual book doesn't have.
1. You can set it on the counter as you are cooking dinner (or any other activity) and read without having to hold it. The ability for it to lay flat without me having to resort to a salt shaker or some other item to hold it open is a great plus for me.
2. As soon as you turn it on it goes directly to where you left off in the book you are reading. (I know bookmarks or dog earred pages do the same thing but I find it cool)
3. No more CRAP this is the second in a series... in less then 60 seconds I can have the first book.
4. The battery life is wonderful. Like I said I got mine on the 3rd of this month. Charged it once. Have picked it up almost every day and STILL have 1/2 of my battery power. And it only takes about 5-10 minutes to give it a full charge.

In the mall the other day I picked up the Sony ebook just out of curiosity. Don't bother. It feels chinsy. And the buttons suck.

Sometimes however you do run across a new book that is not in kindle version yet. I just picked up the real book instead lol


The honey has decided to go to my grandmothers with me on the 24th. Which while being wonderful and nice kind of irritated me at the same time.
I like to have plans. I like to know my plans in advance. For him to switch back and forth really irritated me. Don't get me wrong I wanted him to go but he literally changed his mind 7 times in the last two weeks. So now instead of me driving up tomorrow I am going to drive up on the 24th (The day we are having Christmas) with him. It makes me feel like I don't get enough time with grandma. But then here comes my buddy Sazy saying she will take off Monday so we can play up there. (She will be driving me home)
I swear to you I hit the friend lottery when I met her online all those years ago.

OH!!!! Speaking of friend lottery. We totally picked a fight in Costco over the weekend. No I don't normally do that. But... well here is Sazy's description.....
Okay, I started it, Jody finished it.

We were walking to the front of the store with a cart load. Costco was packed of course. I was following Jody and a woman pushing a cart were behind me. She kept try to get around us and there was no room for her to get around us and she was pushing on me and pushing on me until I said to Jody:

Wait a minute and let this lady go by.....

Lady: Thank you.

....before she breaks my foot.

As she passes us she snots:

I wasn't going to break your foot!

Now she's in front and Jody says cheerfully:

That's okay, I'll break her foot.

So the lady stops and fixes Jody with an evil look, to which she puts her hand up and replies:

Yeah I said it. So?

How rude! says the lady and takes off.

The guy behind me says, She was being rude, not you guys.

Thank you, I tell him.


So that's all, but we laughed about picking a fight and not really getting it but we could have kicked her ass.

LMAO!!!! *twirls in my evil lady outfit.

The ghosts of Christmas past

A friend of mine asked me to post my Christmas memories on a Lost board that I visit. In my head I thought ooooo good blog post too. So what do I do? I come here to post it first.

Growing up I had what I call a bipolar Christmas. By that I mean I had to go to both sides of the family. And let me just tell you they were as different as night and day.

Since my parents divorced when I was three this was every year as I grew up.

My fathers side of the family generally had their Christmas in the morning until about 2pm. So we (my brother and I) would go there first.
Now for this celebration we had to dress up in our best clothes. Which by the way was a freaking joke. Here is that side of the family in suits or fancy dresses or really nice clothes and here come my brother and I in what my mother would consider nice. Let's just say her idea and their idea of nice were completely different.
We would all sit around a perfectly decorated house with perfectly cooked food and open perfectly wrapped presents.
Then it would be time to leave and go back to what we considered the real world.
That side of the families Christmas wasn't real. It was like stepping into another dimension. We did not live that kind of life. This was not reality for us.
Yes, we enjoyed ourselves in a very no no don't touch kind of way but it was like visiting another planet.

My mother's side of the family celebrated completely different. There was nothing perfect anywhere. We could not afford perfect. Hell we couldn't afford a whole hell of a lot but we had creativity and we had love. That made all the difference in the world.
Someone would go to the food bank and get us a turkey. Or one of the neighbors would give us one. Or sometimes, although rarely, we were able to afford one for ourselves. That kitchen was busselling. All my Italian relatives would be huddled in there stirring spaghetti sauce, opening cans of green beans or just getting something ready. I remember the kitchen windows were always steamed up. And the laughter in that room was warm as well.
When it came time to eat we would all pack into the tiny kitchen bumping against each other and fighting our way to the food. And OMG the food that filled that room. No matter how crappy we ate on a normal basis the food that day was bountiful. Breads warm from the oven. Sausages. Pies. Spaghetti and meatballs. Turkey and stuffing. The damn table almost groaned from the weight of the food.
Laughter and love and food. What more could a person want?
After the meal everyone would head outside to start drinking. Of course there was snack food out there too. Beers would disappear rapidly and people would head off for a beer run now and again. The kids would be climbing the trees and being pesty but no one cared. The music would be turned on. Country to begin with switching to Rock and Roll when the drinking got serious lol.
There were many a Christmas that I would walk down a hallway only to have to step over someone who was flat out hammered. Most of the time they would grab you by the legs and tell you they loved you.
Christmas was something cherished and fun on this side of the family.

As I grew older the perceptions of Christmas at each home changed a bit. Yes my fathers side of the family was still "perfect" but through my adult eyes I saw the love that was there too.
My mothers side of the family Christmas didn't change in my eyes. Although now I could drink LMAO!!

Now I spend my Christmas with my Grandmother on my dad's side of the family. We are a little less perfect but still staid. We play board and card games. But we are together.

My mother's side... Well it seems that Christmas has died. The death started when my great grandmother passed away. The get together got a little quieter. But when my Grandma Mema passed away.... well Christmas died. There is no more get together. There is no more giant Italian Christmas dinner. There is no more laughter or fun.
I really really miss that by the way.

I did it :)

Yesterday after writing my post I looked around and got frustrated. I decided the hell with it I am getting a tree. So I hopped in the honey's truck and drove down to Home Depot. I figured it was so late in the month I would just grab me a little three foot tree.
At least I would have a tree in my house!
So I walked into the store and looked at the little trees. None of them screamed take me home.
See I have this ummm system when looking for a tree. Pick one. Pick it up and smash it down onto the ground so all dead needles fall off and the tree fluffs up. Then twirl it around to see if it has any glaring bald spots or strange mutant branches sticking out somewhere it shouldn't be.
The whole time talking to the tree. "She's pretty"... "no, she isn't fat enough"... "Ooooo aren't you are pretty tree"
You get the idea.
After looking at all the different kinds of tiny trees I thought maybe I should just bite the bullet and go to the tree lot across the street. I started to walk back to the truck when it happened.
I saw the lady and her husband twirling this huge beautiful almost 7 foot tree. I stopped and watched them do my system.
Pick, smash, twirl
I must have looked like a goon standing there just staring at them and the trees.

And then my brain shut off.

The next thing I knew I was picking, smashing and twirling giant trees.

The next thing I knew I was carrying an almost 7 foot tree up to the counter while saying "isn't she a pretty tree. Such a good tree."

The next thing I knew I was driving home with the tree. Putting on a tree stand. Carrying the monstrosity into my home.

The next thing I knew I was stringing lights and putting out decorations.

The next thing I knew was it was beginning to look and smell a lot like Christmas.

I still need to finish putting up the ornaments and the outside decorations but the bathroom, computer room, living room, bedroom and kitchen all have decorations. My house smells like pine. There is a warmth that was seriously missing. My tree is beautiful.
Well minus a few bare spots and two, yes count them, two branches that are sticking out in a bizarre way. But hey it is hard to pick a tree by yourself lol. I think I have some scissors around here somewhere anyway. And some ornaments will fill the holes nicely.

Wow I have been busy!

In the last few days I have sent out all my 30+ Christmas cards. Woo hoo me!
I have went Christmas shopping and got almost all the shopping done. Out of 22 people I have 4 left!! Finally!
The only things I have left to do is buy 4 more gifts, wrap all the presents and decorate my house.
But I am having issues with that last thing. I just can't seem to get motivated to do it. I don't have a tree yet which is really strange since I normally have it the first of December. I haven't pulled out any of the Christmas boxes. I haven't done anything at all. NOTHING.
And to be honest I am not sure I am going to. I don't know why. I just don't feel Christmas this year except as a chore. :(
I think a tree would be the push I need but going to get one. Not in the mood. Anyone want to drop one on my porch for me LMAO!!!

I am proud though that I managed my money enough to actually buy gifts. And the honey said he would pay the PG&E and the Internet/phone bill this month so that should be half of the money for the gifts. Everyone is going to get something a little smaller this year and mostly functional. Like I got my mother and stepfather a coffee pot and a bag of coffee. I feel like a cheap asshole but man it is what I can afford. I know people will understand that but inside myself I feel bad. I hope they need a coffee pot LMAO. Well at any rate I know at one point they will because they drink coffee every day all day long. So at some point the gift will be handy. I wonder if I should get them filters too.... hmmmmm

I need to start commenting on your blogs. I haven't all last week which again made me feel guilty.

Seeing a pattern here people? My mother taught me guilt well and it has stuck with me.

OMG is it really only 11 days until Christmas! I just counted on my calendar and almost had a freaking heart attack! That means it is 12 days until I am 42 BLICK

Hmmmmm 11 days until Christmas do I really need a tree and decorations?

Well I promised the honey a nice clean house when he came home and so far I have done nothing but write a blog and play on the Internet so I have to get busy.

11 days... man I am freaking out.

Getting it together

So there were a few questions in my comments and I thought I might as well post the answers....

The Kindle does not have a back light. It has a special technology that makes it exactly like reading a book. There is no eye strain due to looking at a computer like screen because it looks just like regular old ink on a page. So you will need to get a book light. That is one of the next things for me to buy. And I would definitely grab yourself a cover. Just in case you drop the thing it will cushion the fall. And the cover also makes it feel like a real book opening.
I LOVE MY KINDLE!!!!

In regards to the honey not coming to Christmas with me..... I answered the question but lay in bed realizing that I didn't really answer it properly.
My grandmothers is 3 1/2 hours away from our home. His brother lives about 15 minutes from our home.
I promised my grandmother (82 years old) that I would do all the cooking for Christmas back in July. No backing out of that.
The day after Christmas (my birthday) I like to go gambling. He hates gambling. So he gets bored in about 20 minutes and nothing is more frustrating to a avid gambler then someone who leans on the back of their seat sighing in boredom.
Also he wants to go duck hunting that weekend and duck hunting is down here.
His family has a knock down party for Christmas. Booze laughter and lots of fun. They decided this year on the 26th. Normally it is the weekend before which is not a problem. This year the date is a problem.
My family is more ummm sedate.
I would love to go to his families party more then anything but that means getting up in the morning of my birthday, driving 3 1/2 hours and then going to a party that lasts until midnight. That does and doesn't sound like a good birthday. Also I have my friend Sazy up at grandmas and dragging her back down here would just be mean.
I don't duck hunt. *shudders.... and that means I would be home alone like normal.
Sooooooo...... We decided to have him stay home and me go up to grandmas.
I will let you know if that changes because it has 3 times all ready.


I brought out the boxes of Christmas cards. I told myself that I will start writing them today. I don't have to put a personal message in each one right? Not going to happen.


I find it hard to believe but I think my next post is my 100th post. WOW that went super fast!!! I should do some kind of fancy post for the next one. Any ideas?

I have been a bad commenter this week. It seems there is so much to do in the house that I haven't had the time. BUT oh yes I have been reading all of you. I should be back to commenting either today or tomorrow. So just because you haven't seen a comment doesn't mean I forgot about you.

Oh and the honeys niece send me a private message on facebook today. She wanted to let me know that she is pregnant but please don't tell anyone.
She used to live with us before the honeys mother passed away and the world went to hell. That is a post for another day. Anyway she and the honey don't talk. Her mother doesn't talk to any of the honeys 3 other brothers. Again story for another day. So here I am with this secret.
I know this is going to end badly. Somehow the honey is going to find out that I know and ask me when I started talking to her again. Why I didn't tell him. Blah blah blah. I am not sure if I should just tell him or not.
He all ready thinks that me being on facebook is weird and doesn't understand why I have "MEN" as friends. No matter how much I tried to explain to him that they were old coworkers.
And let me just lay it on the line here people I am a good girl. There is NO hanky panky ever from me in regards to my relationship. Period.
So this stupid secret has the potential to be bad UGH.

Anywhoo... post 100 tomorrow :)

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

It is freaking Freezing here! Seems like a lot of people are getting snow. Living in California we don't. Sigh. I would love to wake up to a blanket of snow once in a while but the last time it snowed here was 1978. So it looks like my chances of that are small.

I am loving my new kindle. It is so easy to use and very comfortable to hold. I have all ready read one book on it and have purchased two others to read. Two paranormal romances and one zombie book. But I have to finish the paper books that I bought before really using my kindle even though I don't want to lol.

I am really getting frustrated at the lack of job here. Sending out anywhere from one to six resumes a day and not even hearing a peep is making me feel a little inadequate for some reason. The honey says not to worry that I will get a job after the new year but man I am worried. My unemployment will be running out in 4 1/2 more payments and if I don't get an extension I am in a world of trouble. I am not even sure if they are still doing the extensions. The last time I was in this spot they didn't have extensions and the money just stopped. Thankfully in January I can send for my tax refund if I get my W2's in time. That is a little money that will help for sure if there are no extensions.
The honey told me I should start some schooling. I would need something that I could learn in a year. He said he would help with the bills while I went to school. The problem is what in the heck do I go to school for. Any ideas would be great.

My grandmothers dog is doing ok. She has a giant cast on her front leg and needs to be carried out to go potty. Today she got 14 inches of snow so that is probably a pain in the ass. Not to mention the poor dog got diarrhea from the medication. It can't be easy taking care of all that. I am thankful that my uncle is there to help.

I don't have any Christmas items up at all in my house yet. No tree, no nothing. I just don't have the mood for some reason. I need some Christmas cheer.

The honey will not be doing Christmas with me this year. That makes Thanksgiving and Christmas spent apart. It is a strange thing for me. It makes me feel a little sad. He will be going to his family's Christmas party on the 26th instead. I will be at a casino gambling my birthday money on that day since it IS my birthday. Sucky birthday right? At least my buddy Sazy will be with me for Christmas. Last year we had snow. I can wish for that again right?