Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Well this sucks and other stuff

Here it is September 30th. That means the one month I gave myself to look for a estimator job is gone. Time for me to look for any work I am qualified for.
I have got to change my mind set that this is a bad thing. I have to start looking at it in a positive way. That I am about to embark on a journey into something new and exciting.
But I can't seem to do that.

I almost feel like a failure that in one month I had one interview. One.

Boo freaking hoo. I need to snap out of this self pity shit.

So I guess wish me luck as I start searching for everything and anything. Wish me luck that I will find a job quickly. Wish me luck that I will be happy when I do find one.

A friend of mine told me I needed to play farmville on facebook. Now I have hated facebook since I first looked at it. But you know what....Farmville is addicting! No seriously OMG addicting. I love all the graphics and the challenge of creating a farm that is my personality. It isn't quite there yet but I am working on it. But first I need to expand it for the second time lol. Now I spend quite a bit of time playing stupid games on Facebook.

Have you ever had a arguement in a car with someone? One of those disagreements that you can't escape because you are rolling down the highway? I had one with my father. Ok actually I had several but the one that made us drive the rest of the way in silence really pissed me off. He was totally pissed that he had to vote on the issue of gay marriage.
Yes I know this was months and months ago. *rolls eyes
Needless to say he voted no.

Then the arguement started. My father said something along the lines of "they shouldn't be allowed to get married."
I asked him very sweetly (always pay attention when I get super sweet... I am about to blow) Why?
He spouted off a bunch of crap at which point I turned to him completely pissed off and actually quite frustrated.
I asked him how he thought we (non gay) people were doing with marriage. He said fine. I said Bullshit. We have people on their 3rd, 4th and 5th marriage. Maybe we should allow them to bring back the sancitity of marriage. That maybe they would actually BELIEVE in the vows they took.
I asked him why they shouldn't be allowed to marry.
I was given a blurb about the bible. I asked him if God created everyone and he said yes. I asked him if God created everyone in his own image. He said yes. Then I asked him why he would create someone who shouldn't have the same rights as everyone else. I told him he didn't. That we as humans are the ones who make people different. That is why the "black" people were slaves. Because they were different and we as a human race are asses.
It all boiled down to him getting pissed at me for believing that a race of people should have equal rights. And him being astounded that I was willing to stand up for what I believe against him. That my mortal soul was in danger because I believe in equality for all.
That my mortal soul was in danger because I believe two people who love each other should be allowed to be married.

My mortal soul is in danger because I believe that? Unreal.

The God I believe in is all forgiving. Is loving. Is caring. Loves me and everyone else for who they are. My God doesn't pick and choose who to love.

I am not sure I want a part of a God that does either.

Anywhoooo... I miss reading your blogs. I have snuck in a few here and there but I have a lot to catch up on.


  1. You are AWESOME!! I love how you stood up to your dad like that (not easy to do with my own dad) but I especially love your views. No I am not gay, but I believe in an all loving God who doesn't pick who to love either. And I do think that gay people really do "get" the sanctity of marriage too. For me, it is just basic common sense!! I have been told that my soul was in danger because I thought there was nothing wrong with gay people. GRRRR....

  2. Ahh parents. At least some of them. Almost no point in even arguing with them over some of these issues - it's a mindset and the way they were raised.

    Go get your award Jody! You deserve it!

  3. Good luck with the job hunt. Its hard out there. I play FarmTown and its pretty much the only good thing about fb right now. I love it.

    Have you seen "For the Bible Tells Me So"? its a documentary that I bet you would like - you should check it out.

  4. I know a lot of people who play Farmville ... I played a little bit of YoVille at one point, but that's about it.

  5. I'm sorry to hear you didn't get better results from this 30 days. I know it's frustrating when you want a job doing a certain thing and you just can't seem to find one.

    I could throw out some platitudes along the lines of "at least you got one interview, that's more than a lot of people get" or "just be patient. Something will work out" but those platitudes don't really help so I won't... Oh wait... Hmmm. Well, anyway...

    What I will say is this, If you limit your focus too much, you might miss something. You never know when a great opportunity might come along that has nothing to do with Estimating, but will turn out to be even better than what you've been doing, or looking for!

    Don't give up on looking for Estimating jobs, but cast a wide net, you never know what you might find...

    Speaking of casting nets, I feel the same way you do about Facebook, only for me it's Fish Wrangler that I'm addicted too! I play it all day, every day. It's a sickness, for sure!

    I wish I knew just the right thing to say about your argument with your dad. It truly is flabergasting to me that people can have the mind set that he does, and yet I get it, because my mother is the exact same way.

    All I can say is, as a gay Christian, I am grateful and honored to have a friend like you who sees things the way you do! Thanks!

  6. I could go on and on about the marriage issue. It wasn't that long ago that interracial marriage was not "allowed". Discrimination was wrong then and it's wrong now. Someday people will look back and be ashamed. I hope that day is soon.